At the finale of my last letter, I left for the search of another plot twist that would satisfy my craving for a rush.
I have returned from that hunt.
I read Divergent by Veronica Roth.
"In Beatrice Prior's dystopian Chicago world, society is divided into five factions, each dedicated to the cultivation of a particular virtue--Candor (the honest), Abnegation (the selfless), Dauntless (the brave), Amity (the peaceful), and Erudite (the intelligent). On an appointed day of every year, all sixteen-year-olds must select the faction to which they will devote the rest of their lives. For Beatrice, the decision is between staying with her family and being who she really is--she can't have both. So she makes a choice that surprises everyone, including herself."I had high expectations for this book. People have been raving about it on Goodreads, and I've seen it during several trips to Barnes & Noble.
Excerpt from Goodreads.com
It was yet another disappointment.
There were at least four twists that should have blown me away. Only one did, and it wasn't the one that mattered the most.
I finished it feeling empty.
Why?
I read like a writer. I'm constantly figuring out what will happen later on instead of enjoying what is happening in the moment. I analyze, critique, and generally view the book from a distance instead of letting myself submerge into the story.
One of the ways I avoid becoming emotionally involved is that when the suspense couldn't get any more tense, I step away. I put down the book or pause the movie and go get food. I read most of Divergent late into the night, and at 2 am when I was nearing its climax, I closed the book and when to sleep.
Part of the reason I could step away was that I knew what was coming next. I searched for the future of the story and saw it coming long before it ever arrived. In seeking out what would provide the rush, I completely missed out on the thrill of stumbling upon it.
The fault of transparency lies not with the book but with me.
I've trained myself to expect anything and everything, to look for those shadows that provide foresight. I need to to stop chasing after them. I need to let the story be without trying to pry it apart to see ahead. I need to approach a book not expecting anything remarkable in its plot.What drives me to read a story is the search for the twist. What should to drive me to read is concern over the protagonist. The anxiety over what might happen to her doesn't fall upon me these days. I back away when it gets tense to avoid caring about her.
I need to let myself learn how to love characters again. When I do, I'll find their stories much more satisfying.
When I do, I'll finally be reading like a reader again.
This ever-learning lover of stories,
Janelle
2 comments:
It's really easy for me to get so caught up in the story of a book or movie that I let it take over my mind for several days. But then if you don't start living in the story you just don't get as much out of it. There is a hard balance between really loving a story and being able to walk away and continue life as normal. Ah, the trials of readers and deep thinkers!
It's the same for me. I typically let myself wholly absorb into a story for a day or two, just to get through it. Then I honestly kinda forget about it. There are some books, though, that I don't do that with. The Lord of the Rings for example. All three volumes combined are over a thousand pages. So I'm slowly making my way through it. (I've had it for well over a month, and I only just finished the Two Towers. =)
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